


Rei's and Juuzou's birthdays

by merlywhirls



Category: Tokyo Ghoul
Genre: Animal Death, Implications of Cannibalism, Mentions of Violence, but other than that... birthday!, depictions of violence, like canon typical stuff, mention of mild suicide ideation, mentions of abuse
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-06-08
Updated: 2016-06-08
Packaged: 2018-07-13 01:37:51
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,479
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7133153
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/merlywhirls/pseuds/merlywhirls
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Rei's birthdays at 13 and 16. Juuzou's birthdays at 19 and 22.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Rei's and Juuzou's birthdays

xiii.

Rei woke up before the sun did, before his Mama did, too. The city outside his window was still dark and sleepy, but he couldn’t remember its name. Mama never really told him where they were when they moved, and it usually didn’t matter to Rei either way. But he wanted to remember the name of this city.

Mama said they could go out today as a special treat. Rei had earned enough good boy points to ask if they could go out somewhere, and Mama promised to take him shopping. He didn’t care what they did, as long as he could walk in the streets and see all the people.

It was already warming up to the heat of summer day as the sun slowly climbed the horizon. Rei wanted to wake Mama up now, jump on her bed and beg her to hurry and up get ready so they could go, but he didn’t dare. He waited in his room impatiently, doing hand stands and somersaults to work out his excess energy. He paused at every sound echoing in the underground compound, listening intently to see if Mama was awake yet.

Mama finally opened his door as the sun rose over his line of sight. He guessed it must be around midday, as that was usually when Mama got up. She already had her make up on and her hair done as she stood in his doorway, red lips pulled into a glorious smile.

Rei smiled back.

“Happy birthday,” his Mama said, and opened her arms for a hug. Rei leaped in and giggled as Mama twirled him around and plopped him onto his bed. She rummaged through the boxes holding his clothes, picking out garments and holding it against his small body. Rei swung his legs excitedly.

“We going out today, Mama?” he asked.

“Of course,” she replied as she pulled his shirt over his head. “I did promise, didn’t I?”

Rei nodded. Mama gave him a new shirt to put on. “What ward are we in?”

Mama narrowed her eyes. “Why?” She started rummaging through another box on Rei’s floor.

“I wanna remember this place,” Rei replied. “What’s it called?”

Mama found an old hair brush and started combing Rei’s hair. She wasn’t gentle, she never was, but Rei hardly noticed and managed to keep his head in place while she tugged.

“We’re in the 8th ward,” Mama said eventually. She used her fingers to style Rei’s hair so it fell over his face and framed his cheeks. “Koto. It’s spelled like this.”

In the dirt coating the floor, Mama spelled out 江東区, and waited as Rei’s slender fingers copied the characters underneath.

“We’ll go when it’s dark,” Mama said. “You have training to do, first.”

Rei retrieved his knives from under his pillow, slotted them between his fingers like claws. Mama patted his head.

“Make Mama proud.”

*

xix.

His name was Juuzou now.

The higher ups called him into a meeting last week, talking all this boring stuff about how he won’t graduate from the academy like usual. He didn’t pay attention to the details, just that he was going to pass his exam while being on active duty as a Rank Three. He met his new partner a few days after that, and he helped Juuzou fill out his family registry forms.

Or rather, Juuzou’s partner filled out the forms while Juuzou ordered one milkshake after another.

“I don’t know if you remember,” his partner started at Juuzou’s third shake, “But I was there, when we found you.”

He doesn’t remember. Looking at his partner now, Shinohara-san, he thought maybe he would have remembered. He’s a big man with a surprisingly soft disposition that Juuzou immediately didn’t trust. But that night was still mostly a blur.

Juuzou wanted to say, _when you took me from Mama_ , but he knew the people at the CCG didn’t like when he talked about her. Too many forced counselling sessions with the appointed psychologist at the academy taught Juuzou not to mention her.

Shinohara-san cleared his throat. “I, uh, requested that I be partnered with you when you graduated.”

“That’s creepy,” Juuzou said as he licked throff off straw. “Are those nearly done?”

It was Shinohara-san again that met him the day after when Juuzou went to get the keys to his new apartment. The CCG had covered the down payment, whatever that was, and the first month’s rent. Juuzou would be getting a salary now, sent to a bank account that for now Shinohara-san kept an eye on. Juuzou didn’t mind, only meant that he had to ask Shinohara-san when he wanted to buy something, but it also meant that he could say no.

But Juuzou was quick with his fingers, and now no one could tell him when to go to bed.

He watched the clock on his oven now, waiting for the green digits to turn over to midnight. The rest of the kitchen was bare. He didn’t even have a fridge yet, and only a mattress in the adjacent room to sleep on. Shinohara-san had offered that Juuzou stayed over at his place until Juuzou got furniture, but he declined.

The tiles under his arse were cold and numbing. He shifted onto his knees, never taking his eyes off the clock as it ticked over to midnight.

His name was Juuzou now, and he was nineteen. In the morning he’ll start his first day as a ghoul investigator. He had his own apartment, earned money from doing honest work, and was no longer stuck at that stupid academy, or in some decrepit underground compound.

He had everything he never thought to have, and the one thing he always thought he couldn’t live without.

“Let’s go, Rei,” he whispered under his breath as he headed out the front door, not even locking it behind him.

*

xvi.

Cicadas were the first to wish Rei happy birthday. He liked to watch them jump away from his small torchlight, something he nicked from that weird up-tight lecturer, Akon or something, as he danced with them in the grass.

The forest bordering the academy was humid in the summer night. Stray cats sought the shade of the trees to sleep, and Rei knew where each one slept. There was a ginger one not far from where he was now, but she didn’t like being touched. The next closest was probably the mean black cat that liked to jump at him from the tree branches. He named that one Kurona, and whenever he called for the cat he giggled.

He turned off the small torch and threw it on the ground, jumping to grab the closest branch. He’d find the torch later. He wanted to find Kurona the cat now.

The trees were bunched together closely that it was almost too easy swinging from branch to branch. Sometimes he missed the challenge of the tightropes, the swaying trapeze. It was a much longer drop at the Restaurant than the highest point Rei could climb in this forest, so most of the thrill was lost. In the winter, the dark would shade the forest floor so Rei could pretend that if he fell he’d plunge into never ending blackness, but the summer night was not so kind to him.

He could barely feel the friction of crunching bark under his feet. His soles were thick and his feet danced lightly, hardly touching before leaping off again. If he closed his eyes he could pretend he was flying, kicking off clouds of air and soaring through the sky. So he closed his eyes.

His aim was less accurate now, slipping off and fumbling to grab the next branch, but Rei kept his eyes shut tight. He could feel trickles run down his cheeks, probably small spurts of blood from cuts and scrapes he couldn’t feel.

After a while he paused, listening to the night. Rei could feel eyes boring into him, a predator about to leap on its prey. At the last moment, Rei dived to the ground, and Kurona the cat smacked into the trunk of the tree. It mewled weakly before dropping to the ground too, circling around Rei as if it didn’t trust him but wanted pats anyway.

Rei reached out to touch Kurona before it swiped at his hand. Three parallel scratches began to bleed on the back of his hand as he grumbled at the cat.

“Fine, I’ll bring you sweets,” he told the cat. “But only because I want them too.”

Kurona watched him with passive eyes as he tiptoed out the forest and crossed the academy grounds.

*

xxii.

Juuzou turned twenty-two on the back of a ghoul.

He could hear Hanbee shouting hysterically somewhere in the distance. He’d gotten a lot stronger recently, no longer shied away from the blood and gore of investigating, but every now and then he would scream as if he were caught on fire.

Juuzou slit the ghoul’s throat and fell unceremoniously to the ground. Her kagune wasn’t even activated, which Juuzou thought was a pity. A new quinque would have been a nice birthday present.

“Hanbee,” Juuzou shouted, “Shut up.”

Nakarai stood beside him, only an inch taller, which annoyed Juuzou to no end. He didn’t mind being small, came in handy most times, but that small distance between him and Nakarai was just too close to not be a little miffed. Juuzou stood on his tippy toes to watch Hanbee at the end of the alley, clumsily dispatching a ghoul with Tamaki.

“Happy birthday,” Nakarai said, also watching Hanbee and Tamaki. “I just wanted to say it first, because I know it’ll piss off Hanbee.”

It was Tamaki’s blow that finished the ghoul, and Juuzou could see Hanbee’s broad shoulders slump in relief.

“He’d be more pissed off if you gave me a present before he did,” Juuzou said hopefully.

Not surprisingly, Nakarai pulled a lollipop out of his pocket.

Mikage approached them from behind, standing beside Nakarai as he said, “The rest of the alley way seems to be clear. Also, happy birthday.”

Juuzou grinned as Mikage withdrew a pack of sour lollies from his pocket and gave it to him. He clutched it to his chest.

Tamaki and Hanbee staggered away from their slaughtered ghoul, still a few metres away when Tamaki shouted, “Happy birthday, boss!”

Hanbee spluttered, his indignant tone reverberating off the brick alley walls. He ran the rest of the distance, stopping in front Juuzou.

“Happy birthday, Suzuya-senpai,” Hanbee gasped. “I’m not too late, am I?”

Juuzou patted Hanbee’s head as Nakarai said, “It’s three past twelve, Abara. You’re three whole minutes late. The rest of the squad have already said happy birthday.”

Hanbee looked like he wanted the concrete to swallow him up, staring dumbly at the lollies clutched to Juuzou’s chest. “And they gave you presents,” he whispered, horrified.

“It’s okay, Hanbee,” Juuzou said. “You can carry me back home for being so profoundly late.”

Hanbee nodded enthusiastically, turning around and crouching for Juuzou to climb onto his back. Juuzou leaped, wrapping his arms around Hanbee’s neck.

“Take me home, my noble Hanbee stead,” Juuzou laughed and Hanbee started up at a jog.

Juuzou turned to wave good-bye to the rest of his squad. They would stay to meet the clean up crew and write the preliminary reports. Juuzou had the day off.

Astride his Hanbee, Juuzou disappeared into the night of June.

*

xiii.

Training wasn’t so hard that day. Lately, Rei could feel less and less of what was being done to him. It made him more efficient, and it made Mama happier. She liked it when Rei was quiet and compliant, and Rei liked making her happy.

Mama was in a good mood when she dressed Rei for their outing. She kept complimenting his hair, his beautiful large eyes. He didn’t even mind it so much today when she called him a beautiful girl, her perfect little doll. Mama was happy, so Rei was happy too.

The sun was down by the time they left the compound. Mama had put a blindfold over his face so he didn’t know which way was out, but he expected it. What was important was the sight before him when the blindfold came off. Glittering buildings scraping the night sky above, the lights of the street dimming out the stars in the sky. But the city had its own stars, so close that Rei could touch them.

Mama held on tightly to his hand as they walked through the streets. Rei couldn’t walk straight, too busy turning his head and shifting his body to have a look at something, anything, all of the people walking and laughing and the shops with brilliant lights. Rei had hardly seen so many lights before.

Every time they passed a window, Rei would ask, “What’s that, Mama?” She would always answer; that’s a boutique, that’s where the humans eat, that’s a hotel, that’s an art gallery.

Rei would ask, what’s a boutique? What do humans eat? What’s a hotel, what’s an art gallery? Mama indulged him in them all.

They walked around for two hours, not yet stopping in any of the shops. Mama had said she’d take Rei shopping but he wasn’t bothered; he just wanted to look at everything. He asked why everything was still open even though it was night, and Mama said they stayed open late just for his birthday. Rei didn’t believe it, but it was a nice thought.

She even picked him up and put him on her shoulders so he could see the Tokyo Gate Bridge on the horizon. It was huge, with weird cage designs on top and underneath the bridge, and Rei wondered what it would be like to climb.

His favourite was the exhibition building. Mama said it was called the Big Sight, four pillars each holding an upside down pyramid, glowing green and blue in the night. The colours changed like waves, melding together like a calm ocean, and Rei was entranced. He asked if they could go inside, but Mama had said no, so he just imaged what it would be like to climb that, too.

The department store Mama took him to was colourful. Rei wanted to dash between the clothes, the blurring of colours, but Mama held onto his hand tightly. She picked out dresses for him, held them against his body to see their size. He agreed with whatever she chose, and then it was time to go home.

Mama blindfolded him again and he nearly fell asleep. She shook him awake once they reached his room.

“I need to see you in your new clothes,” she said. “You’ll look amazing!”

Rei complied. He was sleepy, but he had never seen his Mama this happy before. She stroked his face as she reapplied his make up, and sighed sadly.

“Soon, all of this will be gone.” She dropped the eyeliner beside her, her other hand reaching for something in the darkness. “You’re thirteen now. You’ll start to change. We’re lucky it didn’t even happen sooner!”

Rei didn’t understand what she was talking about, but her free hand trailed up his leg and he started feeling nervous.

“Mama?” he asked.

She smiled at him, but it was a gruesome smile, her red lips pulled taunt without showing her teeth.

“I know just what to do about it,” she whispered. Her hand grabbed at him, squeezing tight. “I just have to get rid of these!”

Rei saw stars like the lights of the city as the hammer came down.

*

xix.

The city night felt different this time. Maybe because it was a new city, or maybe because Juuzou didn’t have to hold his Mama’s hand the whole time, but this time everything looked better, felt better, even smelled better.

The people looked less interesting this time, though, but it was probably because of the proximity of CCG headquarters. Juuzou had a quick look around the headquarters, just to see what it was like, before he was ushered out of the building by a stern looking receptionist. He tried telling her that he worked for the CCG, but his ID hadn’t been produced yet, and she refused to look him up on the system.

It didn’t matter. There were a lot more interesting places that Juuzou could visit, and this time he could climb on whatever he felt like. He had some money that Shinohara-san gave to him earlier, and he bought so many sweets the shopkeeper expressed concern.

“You’ll get a sore stomach,” she said. Juuzou laughed.

He settled atop a tall building, overlooking the city. He balanced on the lip of the building’s edge, walking up and down as if it were a tightrope. It was much better than the trees and the forest at the academy. If he were to fall, it would be over.

He walked around the perimeter of the building. He treated himself to a lolly when he reached his starting point again.

“How many good boy points would that be?” he asked. He paused as he waited for the answer in the winds. “I can’t remember.”

Juuzou did handstands, tilting his head to look over the edge. There were still many cars out on the roads. Juuzou imagined crash landing on one, making a big dent in the roof. He’d probably squish the driver, and the thought made him giggle.

“Squish them like a bug, Rei,” he whispered. He put himself back on his feet and ate more sweets.

Finally, he sat on the edge, his legs dangling over and swinging in the summer breeze. The city was starting to get lighter again, the sun a distant friend waiting to come in. Juuzou picked out all of the orange flavoured lollies and threw them into the street, trying to follow its path down to see where it landed. He lost them.

He couldn’t remember what time he had to meet Shinohara-san. Being early was probably better than being late, and Juuzou didn’t exactly know where he was anymore. He climbed down the building and began wandering aimlessly in the streets, stopping every now and then to have a look at the shops.

The sun was smiling when Juuzou found the CCG headquarters again. He could see Shinohara-san’s balding head sitting on the benches outside the front doors as he arrived, and crept up behind him.

“Boo!” he shouted and Shinohara-san jumped out of the bench in surprise.

He clutched at his chest as he said, “Juuzou! You can’t do that to an old man.”

“And why not?” Juuzou pouted. “It was funny.”

Juuzou could see that Shinohara-san was holding back a smile. “You could have given me a heart attack.”

Juuzou grinned. “That would have been even funnier.”

“Yeah, yeah,” Shinohara-san muttered. “You’re late, by the way.”

Juuzou furrowed his brows, glaring up at the sun. “How late?”

“An hour,” he relied gravely.

Juuzou blinked in surprise. Keeping track of time was hard without a watch, but he didn’t think he was that late. He didn’t think he was late at all. How long did he spend on that roof? Wandering the streets? He tried to shrug it off.

“It’s my first day,” he said off-handedly.

Shinohara-san sighed. “We better get going. Lots to do today.” He paused as he gazed down at him. “Happy birthday, Juuzou.”

Juuzou grinned and raced into the building. First day of a new life.

*

xvi.

One of the strangest things about living at the academy, about being taken in by the CCG, was that Rei could have sweets whenever he wanted.

Not that the staff gave it out all the time. Just that it was incredibly easy for Rei to sneak into the kitchens. They had had a meeting last week about the ‘issue’ of missing food. The headmaster urged whoever was sneaking into the kitchens to come forward and stop their raid. It took all of Rei’s will not to laugh.

It was hard sneaking around Mama, and even harder to find hidden sweets wherever they were. Mama didn’t keep much human food for him, and often brought home random items without knowing what they were. They day she brought home a box of donuts was one of the best days of Rei’s life. But when she realised how much power donuts had over Rei, she used it to her advantage.

But it was different now, Rei thought. He could get cakes and lollies whenever he wanted, and he didn’t need to earn any good boy points for it. He didn’t need to kill anyone or do tricks. This new system of stealing cakes was a lot more time efficient.

The kitchens had a new kind of lock every time Rei visited, but so far none of them had been able to keep him out. The current lock was big and heavy, requiring a key that Rei didn’t have. He puzzled over it for a few minutes before he decided.

He’ll just break a window.

He felt his skin slice open on the back of his arm as he climbed through the broken window, but it didn’t sting. The blood running down his arm was warm and sticky, and he rolled up the edge of his shirt to encase it. The shirt was instantly soaked through, but Rei was done worrying about it. It would heal on its own and wouldn’t bother him again. Right now he needed cake.

He thought that by now the CCG academy would stop stocking cakes, considering how often they were stolen by Rei. But there had never been a time when Rei entered the kitchens, and there wasn’t something sweet to steal.

He grabbed a whole cake, encased in a plastic container, and shoved as many donuts as he could into his mouth before escaping through the window. It didn’t take him long to reach the forest again, and set down the cake and donuts in the first clearing he found.

Rei unwrapped his arm from his shirt. The wound had stopped bleeding, and there was a long line of blood stained onto his shirt, but he didn’t care. He had to go find Kurona the cat now and entice her in with bits of donut.

He wasn’t far from where he left it. He tiptoed through the forest to Kurona’s spot, halting in his steps as he heard movement.

Rei could hear heavy breathing, and a heavy gait that shifted from one foot to the other. There was a stench of blood in the air, and Rei knew it wasn’t from his arm. He crept closer to the sounds, hiding behind tree trunks, to find a large man bending over something. Rei shuffled forward, but his bare feet snapped a stick.

The man turned to face Rei, a snarl on his face and a knife in his hand. Rei recognised him, that creepy investigator that hung around the academy, and he recognised the mess of blood and intestines bundled on the forest floor.

“You don’t tell anyone of this,” the man hissed at Rei. “No one would believe you.”

He took one last look at the pile of what used to be Kurona the cat. He stepped backwards slowly, watching to see if the man would chase after him. The man let him go as Rei ran in the forest, back to the clearing he found for himself.

Rei would eat his birthday cake alone.

*

xxii.

All week Hanbee had asked, “What do you want to do on your birthday?”

Every time, Juuzou answered, “Kill some ghouls!”

He mostly said it because it was the wrong answer. The first time he told Hanbee, the man visibly paled, which was quite a fete for him. 

“You have the day off work,” Hanbee implored. “You don’t need to!”

Juuzou just laughed at his stricken face.

Now, with Hanbee opening his door awkwardly while still holding onto Juuzou, he wondered what he did want to do for his birthday. Since the Restaurant Raid mission where Juuzou was taken in by the CCG, he usually spent his birthday alone. Shinohara-san had been there when he turned nineteen, but he spent the whole day working. They were too busy with Aogiri tree when he turned twenty to really do anything, and actually Juuzou had forgotten it was his birthday.

He spent his twenty-first in a cramped hospital chair, watching Shinohara-san breath, and nothing else.

Hanbee deposited him on the couch, groaning as he stretched out his back.

“I don’t know where you keep all that weight, Suzuya-senpai,” he said.

Juuzou rolled up the leg of his pants, unstrapping his right leg from his thigh, letting the prosthetic fall to the floor in a heavy heap. “I keep it in there,” he said.

Hanbee picked up the leg, weighing it in his hands before putting it on the coffee table.

Juuzou laid out on the couch, stretching his arms over his head. Maybe the first thing he’ll do for his birthday is sleep, and sleep some more, and then maybe eat some of the lollies his squad gave him.

“Hey, Hanbee,” Juuzou said, “Where’s your present?”

Hanbee groaned. “It was too big to bring with me during the investigation. I’ll go home and bring it to you.”

Juuzou waved a hand. “Do it later. Let’s sleep, Hanbee. Sleeeeep.”

There wasn’t enough room on the couch for the both of them, but luckily there was a mattress on the floor beside it. There were mattresses and inflatable beds all throughout the apartment, so Juuzou could fall asleep wherever he was at the time. He used to have a whole bunch of pillows up on the kitchen counter before Hanbee warned him that it was a fire hazard, that all of the mattresses were in fact a fire hazard, but Juuzou only moved the pillows, and only because they were his favourites and he didn’t want them to get burned.

Hanbee fell to the mattress beside Juuzou, not bothering to take off his coat as he settled in. They had started early the previous morning and kept working until midnight, so that even Juuzou could feel the fatigue.

“Good night, sir,” Hanbee whispered sleepily. “And happy birthday.”

Juuzou hummed as sleep began to take over. He thought about the coming day. He’d like to spend his birthday with Hanbee and the rest of his squad. He’ll pester them into buying him lunch, Juuzou decided, then he’ll go see Haise. Haise had told him a few days ago that he would bake Juuzou a cake, and Haise’s cakes were the best.

Then, when the sun would be setting again, he’d go see Shinohara-san. He’d tell the man about his day. His first birthday with so many friends.

Juuzou fell asleep smiling.

**Author's Note:**

> I have So Much to say.
> 
> It was really fun and interesting to do this. Juuzou changes A LOT over the course of canon. I like to think that his erratic behaviour, bordering on dangerous and recklessness, when he's introduced in TG is from finally having the freedom to do whatever he wants. But he's also still a little lost without Big Madam, thus why he still talks to Rei.
> 
> Compared to when we see him at the academy. He's usually alone and very quiet. He has some people he talks to, but really it's just him. We know he spent a lot of time on the grounds, picking at ants and saying weird shit. He's probably still in shock from his dramatic change in environment, and all these new people.
> 
> I've paired up events to his birthday without real consideration. It probably never happened anywhere around his birthday but I did it anyway. Artistic license. 
> 
> Happy birthday to my favourite kiddo!!!!!
> 
> also hanbee got him an indoor tent. imagine the sleep overs.


End file.
